


At the end of a lonely day, you stand there

by Race_582



Series: Self projections... [2]
Category: Sweet Home (Manhwa), 스위트홈 | Sweet Home (TV)
Genre: Anxiety, Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hugs, Implied Bullying, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Loneliness, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Touch-Starved
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-02
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-15 15:36:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 638
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29810610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Race_582/pseuds/Race_582
Summary: The problem with loneliness, isn’t the pain or the helplessness, no. It’s the comfort. The familiarity of nothingness becomes bearable, and eventually, once you accept it, it becomes comforting too.-Or, I self projected once again
Relationships: Cha Hyun Su | Hyun Cha/Lee Eun Hyeok | Hyuk Lee (Sweet Home)
Series: Self projections... [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2205774
Comments: 8
Kudos: 20





	At the end of a lonely day, you stand there

**Author's Note:**

> Read the warnings in the tags :)
> 
> Title from Streetlight- Changbin ft BangChan
> 
> Enjoy <3

Hyun had felt alone for so long; no friends, no family, no one. They had taken everything from him and the empty shell that remained was nothing but cold. 

The problem with loneliness, isn’t the pain or the helplessness, no. It’s the comfort. The familiarity of nothingness becomes bearable, and eventually, once you accept it, it becomes comforting too. 

On the bad nights, back at home; he would throw on a hoodie, bury himself under the blankets and cling to the stuffed animal that sat under his bed. He would feel warm and safe and protected, and as his mind drifted off to the universe inside his head and the tears soaked his pillow, the crushing feeling of being alone would dissipate. Leaving behind an empty shell. 

He took comfort in other things too, the little red lines he would draw with silver. The darkness inside his mind. The tightness in his chest. He took comfort in them all, because if he didn’t they would break him in half and crush him. And slowly, very slowly, they became familiar, and they filled the emptiness. 

They occupied the space where happiness used to roam, weighing heavily against his bones, but he didn’t mind, it was better than the nothingness. Eventually, he grew attached to them. The thought of losing them, just like he lost everything else, sent off too many waves in his empty mind. They were the only things he had left, the darkness and the pain and the anger. They were the only things occupying those empty spaces, if they disappeared, he didn’t know what he would become. 

So he clung to them, like his stuffed giraffe, he clung to them in hopes of keeping the loneliness at bay for just a little while longer. 

And then his mind had a new resident, replacing one of his previous occupiers and Hyun grieved. He grieved the loss of the little red and silver lines, he wanted them back. But they never returned, and if they did, they disappeared all too soon. The new resident was louder, so much louder, and despite everything, he only fuelled the crushing loneliness more. The pain took up more space, the anger shrunk and his tight chest became permanent. 

He didn’t have anything left. He didn’t have his blankets, his hoodie, the little red lines. He was alone more than ever. The darkness that filled his empty little shell leaked out through his eyes; now everyone knew how dark he was inside. He didn’t have anything left but the loneliness; the familiarity faded as time passed, this new loneliness was different to before, he wasn’t sure if it was worse, he couldn’t remember. But it wasn’t familiar anymore, a stranger in his own empty mind. 

He couldn’t find comfort anymore, he was alone in more ways than ever. So when he met someone that did nothing but chip away at the crumbs of his shell, he was empty. 

But then, then the person started becoming something inside his mind. Slowly, he blossomed with familiarity. Until, one night, when the darkness spread from his mind to his heart and the cold sat heavy against his bones, he felt a hint of warmth. It was far away, and then it circled his shoulders. The warmth pulled until his chest was warm too, and as he clung to the new feeling his long cold heart ignited. His eyes grew warm as the darkness spilled down, as he buried his head in the sensation. And then he felt it, the familiarity and he clung harder; his empty shell gripped tight as the new feeling seeped into his bones. And slowly, as the warmth stayed far longer than Hyun could have ever hoped, it became an occupant. Merging with the person and blossoming around his empty little shell. 

**Author's Note:**

> Basically i haven’t had a hug in a year and that was the result  
> Thanks for reading 
> 
> Race <3


End file.
